It's easy to make tit jokes when you're a guy. Even easier to then say 'lighten up' when no one laughs. Seth Macfarlane will never understand what it's like to be leered at by millions of people who ignore the context of the work being done. He may never experience this because he's the most unfunny 'comedian' on TV or in film, where he makes the same laddish bullshit non-jokes over and over again when he isn't pretending that mentioning celebrities is the same thing as writing. He has never made me laugh for any reason; he might someday, it's not impossible. Before the Oscars he was merely screamingly unfunny and obnoxious. Afterwards, he's the guy who whittled down the achievements of Mulholland Drive and Monsters Ball into tit jokes and how great it was that these women got naked for him. He could have sung a song about the likes of Michael Fassbender or Stephen Dorff, but dicks are gross, I guess? And who cares when so many are getting totally naked for him to laugh about and point at like a thirteen year old. After a night of coked-up objectification (the same people who counted the 'N' word in Django could probably tell you how many times he made fun of women for working and/or wanting to be taken seriously, I just know it fucking enough) and gently ribbing guys for dating younger women, is it so much to ask that Macfarlane be sent to Prison and strip-searched every day of his life as he lives in fear of the male gaze and what it might mean? Ricky Gervais may have offended some people for deflating celebrity at the Golden Globes, but his mean-spirited tone was directed entirely at the concept of celebrity and that the audience was unable to take a joke. His repeat visits speaks to the fact that they can, to an extent, for all their hemming and hawing. Who in Hollywood thinks women have too easy a time of being taken seriously? Point him out because if it turns out that I'm wrong and women rule everything, or if somewhere there's a legion of people who thought fratboys weren't seeing movies to look at naked women, then point taken. In the meantime, fuck the whole ceremony and fuck Seth Macfarlane, who crowned himself the Paul Ryan of famous people tonight. I won't say entertainer because he simply isn't entertaining. Never has been. Fuck this guy for having nothing better to do than make fun of talented women's weight on national television, cause that's in no way harmful or hideous, is it? I'm not saying the Oscars should be Billy Crystal (who set a new bar for laziness/creepiness last year), but this is unfuckingacceptable in 2013.
Side note: introducing yourself as the voice of a puppet doing more of the same schtick you've been doing all night reaches new heights of narcissism. Please go away you horrible man.
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